The Deseret Dagger

LDS Church To Spend $2B On "Fathers' Lounge" Addition To All Meetinghouses

It's about time. The LDS Church finally announced on Monday that it would soon begin major renovations in all North American meetinghouses, adding the long sought "Fathers' Lounge" to each building. The reported purpose of this massive project is to...

Coming Soon

LDS Church Officially Introduces AI Husbands, Dubbing Them ‘Best Solution’ For Abundance Of Faithful, Single Women

The LDS Church officially announced on Tuesday that it would now provide AI husbands to single sisters, through its "Member Tools" app. To qualify, women must be unmarried, at least 30 years old...

Community of Christ Announces 'Zion's Landing Theme Park’

The Community of Christ, formerly known as the ‘Reorganized’ Church, announced on Tuesday that they are planning to turn their temple grounds into Zion’s Landing Theme Park. After 160 years of planning and a dedication back in 1994, the leadership seems to think what their sacred space needs...

Having Nightmares Of Heber J. Grant? Try This One Weird Trick

We've all been there. Those who are led by God to transition from the Church to Mormon fundamentalism typically have a common experience. First, we learn about the principles of Mormon fundamentalism...

LDS Church, Top Scholars Officially Reject The Literal Existence Of Adam, Dubbing The Belief “Adam-Guy Theory”

In a stunning display of solidarity with atheistic, secular scholarship, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (in partnership with BYU) now teaches that Father Adam did not exist, at least in the literal sense...

One Year After Kirtland Temple Purchase, LDS Church Acquires Community Of Christ Membership In Record-Breaking $550M Deal

After a year and some change, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints strikes another big deal with the Community of Christ, its "much poorer, not as cool, and definitely not as pretty stepsister", according to a Church spokesman. Last year's deal took place on...